Day 274: Hey stud

It's hard to look tough
When your wallet chain connects
To a fanny pack

It was studded -- just like his belt, jacket, and boots. He looked like the unlikely offspring of Joan Jett and a soccer mom.

Day 273: Again?

Unbelievable
Please explain why I am a
Subway barf magnet

Twice in one week? Really? I am now officially terrified of mass transit.

Day 272: Rude Awakening

"A" for effort but
8AM is too early
For accordions

But maybe that's just me.

Day 271: Fashion Sense

The last thing I see
As I drift off to sleep is
Your ill-fitting pants

I don't like pleats on men.

Day 270: Living the Nightmare

The doors slide open
You burst forth and unleash the
Contents of your gut

It could have been worse. It could have happened on me. I'm pretty sure I need to start traveling in a bubble.

Day 269: The Cruelest Month

Spring seems far away
When April is a cold joke
Sent to break your heart

Hopefully by the time this haiku auto-posts in a few days it will be sunny and in the 70s, and I will eat my words.

Day 268: Snnnrrrrkkkkk

With a phlegmy snort
You clear your clogged sinuses
Next to my left ear

Sometimes all I want is a little personal space.

Day 267: Covert Ops

You think you're so sly
Picking your nose with your thumb
But it's obvious

This is why I don't touch anything, ever, on the subway if I can possibly avoid it.